AEW has been so packed with content over the last week that nary a day goes by without me tapping away to bring you the finest (everything I touch becomes timeless) recaps! Here is your round-up of March 9’s AEW Dark, plus Revolution coverage, and all the YouTubes! (All of them!)
Last time on Dark…
Cezar Bononi hauled Pretty Peter Avalon into the ring on a heart-shaped dolly. Jake St Patrick finally got to hit someone! Tesha Price showed some character. Mostly, we got a whole lot of warm-up matches for the PPV. Catch up in our March 6 recap.
Elsewhere in the AEW Arcadia…
The big event of the weekend was the Revolution PPV, which for me turned out to be about one thing and one thing only – Team Taz versus Darby Allin and Sting. The cinematic match far exceeded my expectations and almost made the past 3 months of repetitive promos worthwhile. It was epic. Seeing Brian Cage back in a Lucha Underground setting drove home just how wasted he has been in AEW, where he does little more than drillclaw jobbers on Dark. It was such a fucking good match. If you liked Lucha Underground, if you enjoy seeing guys fall off buildings, if you miss the days when the Dark Order still had creepers, watch this match. Yes, folks, your never-watched-an-episode-of-WCW-in-their-life Dark correspondent has become a Little Stinger! Woo! ❄
The only other match I care enough about to give a paragraph to was the women’s title match where Ryo Mizunami pushed Hikaru Shida to the limit. Shida retained, but the important story was after the match, when all the top women’s talent (including Maki Itoh, who showed up on the pre-show as a surprise substitute for Rebel) had a brawl. It was a good way to remind the viewers that there is some depth in the division, and that it does have characters to push and stories to tell.
The other matches ranged from pretty good to eye-wateringly tedious. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you which was the latter. (*cough* Moxley *cough*) It was a decent show. In news of interest to Dark fans: QT Marshall looked to be turning heel! In the tag team battle royal he eliminated Nightmare Family allies The Gunn Club, then douchily eliminated himself after an argument with partner Dustin Rhodes. The Sammy Guevara vlog version of QT inches ever closer to reality!
Speaking of Sammy’s vlog, episode 310 dropped this week. Sammy’s girlfriend Pam won the BTE Championship! Griff Garrison’s girlfriend also made a cameo. Carlie Bravo showed up as a smitten fan of Tay Conti and Anna Jay, only to get pushed aside by Powerhouse Hobbs. But the big build was Fuego del Sol versus QT Marshall. Alex Marvez helpfully pointed out that Fuego del Sol is now the second worst wrestler in AEW, with a 0 and 23 record. (Somehow, “The Captain” Shawn Dean, despite his brand new AEW contract, is 0 and 32!) Fuego and QT cut a solid promo at the end. Required watching for this week’s Dark!
Being The Elite (episode 246) was one of their usual post-PPV episodes, which is to say they didn’t have much to cut together. We did get to see some more of the Nun Squad, though! Also: Matt Hardy eats grapes, in a reference that went way over my head.
You might be wondering what happened with Dark: Elevation. Well, restart your Kenny Omega exploding barbed wire countdown clocks, folks! It’s now scheduled to debut on March 15.
Till then, here’s episode 79.
Dim the lights, it’s time for Dark.
BOTCH: Team Taz still squashing
Opening Dark tonight is Powerhouse Hobbs for Team Taz. He has Angel Fashion.
Hobbs pushes Fashion to the corner, unloads a few punches then slams him flat. The end.
The matches this episode were filmed ahead of Revolution. Let’s hope that the post-Revolution Team Taz matches are a bit less perfunctory. After the Sting showdown, I’m expecting great things.
POP: Wrestling comfort food
After a snappy PPV recap for all the YouTube fans, we get Azrieal and Danny Limelight working as a team versus SCU. Is Azrieal spelled with an A (as per his Twitter) or without an A (as per Jeremiah 36:26 and the AEW chyron)? Jeremiah was a bulldog, and I’m not a dog person, so I’ma go with the tweety bird on this. (Update: I have been informed that Jeremiah was, in fact, a bullfrog. My point stands.)
Frankie Kazarian gets Limelight into a wrist lock. They put together a beautiful technical opening, then Christopher Daniels comes in and punishes Limelight a little more. Azrieal breaks the SoCal momentum and brings down the vet for a near fall! Apparently Azrieal is a long-time vet of the indies himself, and he does look very comfortable in the ring.
Kaz gets the hot tag and cleans up for SCU. Solid midcard style action here.
POP: Pretty Stable in their trios debut
Here is some glorious undercard trios for ya. We have Cezar Bononi and Ryan Nemeth hauling Pretty Peter Avalon out on his heart-shaped platform. And they’re facing Aaron Solow and his two no-name sidekicks Brick Aldridge and Dean Alexander, all kitted out in Nightmare Family gear. It’s Darktastic!
Solow and Nemeth open it up, then Aldridge, who is a monster we’ve never seen before. PPA tags in and the big man dominates him. Alexander has less success – the Pretty Stable isolate and kick the shit out of him. Solow gets the hot tag and hits a bunch of aerial offense on everyone, but Bononi catches him and suplexes him to a halt.
Daddies. pic.twitter.com/GbnC0jP8YJ
— Peter Avalon (@PAvalon) March 10, 2021
Nemeth puts Alexander down for the pin. This match was pretty messy – Bononi even got a busted up noise! – but high entertainment developmental. If this is the future of Tuesday Night Dark, I will be thrilled.
POP: Dark’s best on show
Next up we have “The Empbruh” Baron Black versus “Big Shotty” Lee Johnson, two of the top Dark talents.
The two of them work through a clean and snappy technical opening sequence. Out on the floor, Black hits a brutal suplex, leaving Johnson nursing a very sore back. Things don’t improve for Shotty in the ring. Atomic drop! Backstabber! Back breaker! Hail to the Empbruh!
Drop kiiiick! Johnson hits back, and eventually takes it with a Blue Thunder Bomb.
POP: Tag team chaos
It’s an eight man tag! Dark Order have teamed Colt Cabana, Evil Uno, Stu Grayson and Alex Reynolds together to take on the jobber quartet of Aaron Frye, D3, Jon Cruz and Vary Morales.
Reynolds and D3 to open. The centurion quickly tags out to Frye, who eats the bulk of the Dark Order offense. Cabana and Uno are on fire here, pulling out all the comedy wrestling poses and facial expressions they can muster. Uno ends up stranded, allowing the jobbers a chance to hit some spots of their own.
The end of the match is fairly amusing. Cabana sets up Cruz for the Chicago Skyline finisher, but the ring isn’t clear! First he has to wait for Uno to hit a flatliner on Morales, then for Reynolds to hit a tombstone piledriver on Frye, then for Grayson to hit his Knightfall back breaker on D3. At this point, the Chicago Skyline is a big nothingburger, but it gets Dark Order the win.
FINE: Wrestling with linguistics
Varsity Blonds are getting some developmental in against Occult Pro Wrestling Star RYZIN and this mystery dude with a forgettable name Cameron Stewart. Excalibur lets us know he’s from the home of Anne with an E herself – Prince Edward Island.
Excalibur also brings up the Blondes versus Blonds confusion, and confirms the rename, without commenting on the dumb fact that the English language still has gendered forms for this word. So long, sweet E, we hardly knew ye.
Stewart and Brian Pillman Jr get into it. Pillman fully has the advantage. Ryzin goads Griff Garrison into the ring to distract the ref. This gives Stewart a chance to tag out, and Ryzin puts the boot into the Blonds. Then Stewart returns and is immediately destroyed by Garrison. Oh well, good try.
FINE: Diamante on the move
Diamante has a solo bout today versus Savannah Thorne, a debuting talent out of South Carolina.
Thorne has the typical AEW women’s jobber problem of not wearing a head band, so we don’t see much of her face. I think she sells Diamante’s crossfaces fairly well, behind all that hair.
Diamante hits a Code Red to put a exclamation point on this squash.
POP: Are you ready to go toe-to-toe with Fuego?
HERE IT IS! The most-anticipated Dark match since Brandon Cutler versus Peter Avalon. It’s QT Marshall versus Fuego del Sol!!!
The crowd immediately starts a “this is awesome” chant before the match even starts. I don’t know if there are any legit fans in attendance, but the enhancement talent are serious about putting these guys over. Taz and Excalibur sell it as the biggest match ever too.
Del Sol has the upper hand to start, hitting all of his aerial maneuvers. But when it comes time for the Tornado DDT, QT blocks it and hits back with a full heel repertoire. Del Sol goes for a second DDT, but QT counters again, tossing the smaller man up for a punch to the jaw.
Sammy Guevara joined the YouTube live chat! In fact, the YouTube chat window is worth a paragraph of its own as the 20,000-strong Vlog Army spam it full of 🌪️ and 🔥 emojis.
Back in the ring, QT attempts the Diamond Cutter, but del Sol escapes! He heads up to the turnbuckle and… I can’t believe my eyes! He hits the tornado DDT! But he hits it so hard that QT rolls all the way out of the ring, avoiding the pin fall. Amazing.
Wow! What a night!
Didn’t go my way but I FINALLY hit the TORNADO DDT!
Overwhelmed by the love and support from my peers, the @AEW staff, and all my fans! Truly warms my heart!
I’ll keep working. I’ll keep getting better. Don’t worry, my time is coming! pic.twitter.com/cOfcMeVtbQ
— Fuego With The Nice Ass! (@FuegoDelSol) March 10, 2021
Del Sol goes for another DDT, but QT counters into a Diamond Cutter, then another one, and that’s all she wrote. QT heel turn confirmed. Del Sol extends his losing streak.
POP: Special Relationship
Our cooldown match is Carlie Bravo fighting solo. He’s facing Kip Sabian.
Sabian immediately mocks our former marine by saluting the crowd, like a heel. Meanwhile Anthony Ogogo and Taz on commentary fight over how to make tea, and whether football means real football or that weird American game with the oval-shaped ball.
Back on the floor someone has started a “USA” chant, which makes sense this time around. Just wait till the pandemic is over and these two fight in the UK! Sabian stomps Bravo and addresses the camera directly, asking for a real challenge. Bravo is giving him one, though!
They have a decent back-and-forth, till Sabian snaps and hits a gut buster and corkscrew something for the win.
POP: Abad-oh no she better don’t
Our second women’s match is zombie Abadon versus one of my low-key faves Katalina Perez.
Perez shoots for a drop toe hold, but Abadon just stops dead still, subverting the internal logic of wrestling that says moves like the drop toe hold should work in real life. She snaps her neck around and crawls toward the pink-haired New Yorker, then bounces her head against the mat.
Perez connects with a few shots, but this is Abadon’s party. Cemetery Drive. Splat.
FINE: Janela takes a snooze
Our main event is Sonny Kiss and Joey Janela versus Santana and Ortiz!
For some reason Santana and Ortiz don’t have their Proud and Powerful entrance music, and it seems to have put them in a shitty mood, as they immediately toss Joey Janela over the barricades at the side of the ring. Sonny Kiss is left alone with Ortiz, but has strong enough offense to stay in control.
Not having a partner catches up to him eventually, though, as the New Yorkers steadily gain the upper hand. Kiss endures a full suite of offense till Janela finally wakes up and comes in for a feeble hot tag that doesn’t go much of anywhere.
I can Kip up!!!! Swear to god!!! #AEWDark
— “The Bad Boy” Joey Janela (@JANELABABY) March 10, 2021
I mean, he hits a tope and sets up a few spots with Kiss. But it’s not enough – this match is Proud and Powerful’s. I like the story they were trying to tell, but Janela did come across a bit weaker than usual.
This was one of my favorite Dark episodes in a long time. All of the talent was my kind of thing – more technical and aerial work than big hosses or other squash-tacular stuff. I love seeing all the jobbers and enhancement talent work hard to put on a show. It’s still not clear where Dark will be going in the future, but I’m happy to find out.
Dynamite this week already has a full stacked line-up dealing with fallout from Revolution. New signee Ethan Page (from popular Impact tag team The North) will be dueling with Big Shotty Lee Johnson. Another new signee Christian Cage (aka Edge and Christian’s Christian) will also make an appearance. Plus there is Darby Allin versus Scorpio Sky for the TNT title and a big women’s trios match. It should be a lot of fun.
Just as we go to press today, AEW have also announced Jungle Boy versus Danny Limelight for the first episode of Dark: Elevation, so it seems like that show is going to be the actual dark matches from Dynamite. I look forward to covering those for you next week. Till then, wrestle fans.
