Ave, wrestle fans, have we got a show for you! The bountiful harvest has been reaped and we have nigh on three hours of undercard graps plucked, basted and roasted for your enjoyment. This year I’m thankful for the pause button. Want to know which matches to skip? Read on for our recap of November 24’s AEW Dark.
Last time on Dark…
Lance Archer got to cut another promo on… no one. Frankie Kazarian got angrier. Ivelisse talked trash. Catch up in our November 17 recap, which doubles as a handy summoning ritual for Spike Dudley fans!
Elsewhere in the AEW Arcadia…
Last week’s Dynamite both opened and closed with some Dark-related action! Top Flight lost in an exciting opener with The Young Bucks. In the headliner, Will Hobbs showed up late to defend Darby Allin, then pulled a double-cross, smacking Cody Rhodes in the face with the FTW belt. Aside from gaining him the respect of Cody-haters everywhere, this also cemented his spot alongside Brian Cage and Ricky Starks on Team Taz. Kip Sabian also took a loss to Orange Cassidy, who was clobbered by Miro for his efforts.
Back here in YouTube land, Leva Bates also kicked Kip Sabian’s ass in an imaginary video game rematch on Being the Elite episode 231. Brandon Cutler and Frankie Kazarian continued their bit as naïve greenhorn and exasperated vet.
In a throwback to a Sammy Guevara video from last year (watch Sammy, Fénix and Rick Knox try the one chip challenge), a whole host of folks took part in a super-hot corn chip challenge to become number one contender for the BTE Championship. Ricky Starks somehow stayed in character throughout the whole of it, only for Aaron Solow to accuse him of cheating after discovering an uneaten chip half! Super Panda cried. Luchasaurus cried. In the end Trent ate the extra half chip to earn his rematch with John Silver and a painful trip to the toilet. Young Bucks, killing the business etc.
There is a dump truck of actual wrestling still ahead, so let’s cue up episode 63.
Dim the lights, it’s time for Dark.
MEH: Muscles beats spikes
Opening the show tonight is mystery jobber Vipress versus Big Swole.
Vipress is billed from LA and comes in a costume covered with spikes! We’re all about the spikes lately. She works a fairly deliberate style, with a lot of holds plus the odd throw and strike.
It’s fine. Swole taps her out.
POP: The best of Dark
Next up is everyone’s favorite Dark Order minions Alex “3” Reynolds and John “4” Silver. They’re facing a rockstar random jobber duo: Lee Johnson and Aaron Solow!
Solow and Reynolds both look like palette-swapped create-a-wrestlers, but Solow has green hair so is destined to come out on top of their exchange. He doesn’t fare so well against internet wrestling darling Silver. Johnson gets the hot tag and unleashes a fun offensive sequence before eventually getting overpowered.
Solow has a brief comeback before eating a well-choreographed finishing move and the pin.
POP: Trent the straight man
Building on the tradition established last month on Dark after Matt Sydal’s top-rope trip at All Out, it now appears to be canon in AEW that anyone who slips off the ropes was a victim of pro graps gremlin Michael Nakazawa. Following his stumble on Dynamite the other week, Trent now has to face off with Naka to avenge the botch.
The start of this match is all about ref Bryce Remsburg removing the various oils stowed away in Naka’s gear. Once Remsburg gives them the go-ahead, Naka cuts straight to some family-friendly, in-ring nipple-twisting. Naturally he’s also got some oil planted in a turnbuckle to help him slide free of one of Trent’s DDT attempts, but it’s not enough to save him.
BOTCH: Cake filler
Jobber Tesha Price is back this week to face one of the strongest Dark regulars, Red Velvet.
I quite like Price’s look, but she comes across a bit bored or tired here. There are no major faults, but this match just isn’t interesting. Velvet wins.
BOTCH: Party filler
If Johnson and Solow earlier in the night were our rockstar random jobber duo, this is a couple blokes down at the corner pub playing for drinks. VSK and Baron Black have been teamed up to face Private Party.
VSK and Black are alright wrestlers on their own, but they don’t really gel as a team. Private Party use them for target practice and take an uninspiring win.
Barely a POP: King gets her second win
KiLynn King is here to try bust up the parade of mediocre women’s matches. She’s facing wannabe fashionista Raché Chanel.
It’s been a while since Chanel was in the Dark ring. She’s still pretty rough, but her comedy schtick makes up for some of it. King, by contrast has grown by leaps and bounds since we first saw her and looks every bit a decent midcarder.
Off with her head..☠️@AEW @TheAEWDark @LaFashionista_ pic.twitter.com/MPUphj1eEI
— KiLynn King (@KiLynnKing) November 25, 2020
Not sure I’d POP this one on a normal night, but it hasn’t been a great night. King wins with her new finisher, Kingdom Falls.
POP: From the bedroom…
Sammy Guevara and Marko Stunt have been behind the scenes buds for a while, but have never faced one another in the ring. Tonight everything will change!
The match goes pretty much how you’d expect. Guevara gets to strut about and do some heelish moves. Stunt flips and wriggles his way into some cheery offense. I can’t get it out of my head that they’re just messing about on the beds in their hotel room, though.
Oh well. Still a fun match. Guevara gets the W, obviously.
After the match our Spanish God cuts a promo that has him looking like he’ll be coming for Darby Allin’s TNT Championship. I’m down.
POP: Trash talk and mirror shades
Opening the second hour of this monster episode is Dreamgirl Ellie, who we met last week, and “Superbad” Penelope Ford with her gorgeous valet “Forward Slash The” Kip Sabian.
Ellie is in fluoro gear this week, like she’s auditioning for a spot in TH2. Her in-ring work doesn’t do much to get her over the line, though. This match is saved by Ford and Sabian’s adorable heelish personalities.
Ford gets the win.
OK: Champs tread more water
Last week we were introduced to the fierce but potentially problematically named Jennacide. This week she’s switched it up to “Bionic Beast” Jenna, and she is paired with debuting Lady Frost. They’re up against the Women’s Tag Team Cup champs Diamante and Ivelisse.
Jenna briefly gets to be a monster to kick things off. She tags in Frost who is mostly there to get hit, but when her strikes connect they look stiff as hell. Jenna gets the hot tag and hits a double chokeslam, but ultimately the bored-looking champs take it with a thrust kick code red combo.
POP: Cutler coming up
Next up we have Brandon Cutler – now on a three match streak – versus jobber Adam Priest.
They start with some chain wrestling, but it doesn’t really look convincing since Cutler has like a foot on Priest. The match heats up when Cutler starts to pull out some of his jumping, spinning offense. His earnestness is endearing, even a match that doesn’t go anywhere special.
Cutler’s streak continues.
POP: The Rebel Show
Dr Britt Baker DMD is back with her talk show. She succeeds a little better this week by deludely talking up how funny she was last time, then having Rebel force out some “laughs” at every woeful punchline.
Her guest this week is Tay Conti.
Conti burns Baker when our delusional doctor asks her favorite competitors in AEW. “Besides Anna Jay and I, of course, I’m a big fan of Serena Deeb and … Red Velvet.” When prompted to go on, she names “the most important piece of the women’s division”, Hikaru Shida. Baker is not happy.
After mispronouncing Tay’s name and some kerfuffle over her guest’s personal life, Baker calls in The Acclaimed. Max Caster gives us a shitty rap and takes his shirt off. That is way better than it sounds.
— REBEL not reba (@RebelTanea) November 25, 2020
Good work, everyone, big improvement over last week.
POP: Daddies
Random trios!! This week we have my favorite moustachioed daddy Cezar Bononi, indie hero KTB and guy in a flannel shirt Seth Gargis versus The Gunn Club.
KTB and Austin get straight to business with a hard-hitting back-and-forth. Austin tags out to older brother Colten, who has a less interesting exchange with Gargis. Then – finally – we get the manly face-off we all been craving: Cezar Bononi on Billy Gunn. These two are dynamite together.
Austin takes the blind tag to throw some cold water on proceedings, and gets punished by Bononi, KTB, Gargis and Bononi (again!) for his hubris. Somehow Colten comes to his aid and takes out everyone with his fairly green moveset. He manages to pin Gargis!
This wholesome developmental bout is my match of the night. I really hope we get to see more of Bononi and Billy going at it.
POP: Extinction agenda
Following his appearance with Luchasaurus on BTE a few weeks back, it looks like Super Panda got the call to perform at Daily’s Place! He is paired with Ultimo Panda as Panda X-Press. They’re up against – who else? – Jurassic Express.
When two guys with panda heads walk in to face a boy and his dinosaur, it’s pretty clear this won’t be the most serious wrestling match you ever watched. It isn’t. Ultimo Panda runs himself ragged, Jungle Boy hits one of his fancy arm drags, Super Panda tags in, Luchasaurus kicks him over. This is fun.
Super Panda and Luchasaurus work well together. Ultimo Panda is a little less slick of a wrestler, but he sets up the comedy spots well. Jungle Boy is his ever-gracious self, allowing himself to get belly-smooshed by the two of them, then hilariously scurrying away to let the dino finish ’em off.
Too bad there wasn’t much crowd to watch this.
POP: Tag team wrestling
Here’s one of the Darkiest Dark matches in a while. Where by “a while” I mean the second match of the show. It’s been 84 years… “Flowing Manes” Griff Garrison and Brian Pillman Jr take on TheHybrid2!
Angélico/Pillman, let’s go! Their exchange is solid, but the highlight is Pillman mocking Angélico’s dance moves. Turns out watching that glorious mullet bob up and down the man’s exposed traps is oddly hypnotic.
…
This show is going on so long I’m getting delirious! Jack Evans kicks Pillman in the face. Some other shit happens. Pillman superplexes Evans. And now Garrison is in! And Angélico! This is awesome!
Angélico takes it for TH2 with his evil submission finisher. Great match.
POP: The Acclaimed do their thing
More tag team wrestling now – The Acclaimed versus Alex Chamberlain and Damian Fenrir. Chamberlain’s jobbed on Dark before, but beyond some Instagram photo shoots I can’t find anything about this Fenrir guy. Will it be enough material for Max Caster to pull a diss rap out of his ass?
Yes. Yes it will.
Fenrir eats a bunch of Anthony Bowens’ chops. He gets a couple dropkicks out, then it’s Caster’s turn in the ring. Dude spends most of the time mugging the camera. Chamberlain and Bowens bring the serious wrestling back. It’s alright.
The Acclaimed take it.
POP: Cult-off
Next up – singles! Matt Sydal versus Alan “5” Angels of Dark Order.
Sydal’s commitment to trying to open the third eye of his opponents is brilliant. There is something especially amusing about using the creepy hippie gimmick against a guy whose faction literally tries to get folks to drink the Kool-Aid. AEW, eh? The promotion where all aspiring cult leaders go to wrestle.
Gimmicks aside, this is an excellent “serious” wrestling match. Check it out. Sydal wins.
POP: It pays to be pretty
For the past couple months in Sammy Guevara’s vlog (latest: episode 296), Fuego del Sol has been building a storyline as Dark’s most lovable loser. He’s been shat upon by his booker QT Marshall, dismissed by his friend Sammy, and paraded around by stage mom Cody. Now he’s facing Dark’s losingest loser from the BTE pocket universe: Peter Avalon! It’s the stoppable force meeting the movable object! Who will come out on bottom?
It’s Fuegooooo!
Which is to say “Pretty” Peter Avalon, in his first match free of the librarian gimmick, gets his first win in AEW. Who knew a bit of smooth jazz and airline wine could turn it all around?
POP: We made it!
It’s finally here! The main event! It’s a three-way tag, Chaos Project versus Dark Order’s Evil Uno and Stu Grayson versus Sonny Kiss and Joey Janela. Still up? Ring the bell!
This match is joyous. It’s a spot fest. Oney and Twoey win.
Was this episode of Dark too much of a good thing? At 2 hours 45 minutes, no ads, this was practically PPV length! I don’t mind AEW airing both the good and the bad matches – it gives everyone on the roster the chance to improve – but cramming this much into one show was a mistake. With this much content they could’ve done a regular Tuesday night episode plus dropped a Thanksgiving special to boot. If you’re pressed for time and can only watch one half ahead of Dynamite, start from the Britt Baker segment.
The deadweight is gone. It's time for Leva Bates (@wrestlingleva) to shine!
Watch #AEWDark NOW via our Official YouTube Channel ➡️ https://t.co/zWhJ04yKwe pic.twitter.com/QbiujdmdV9— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) November 25, 2020
Gosh, there were so many matches I didn’t even have time to talk about the promo segments! Here’s the Cliff’s: Leva Bates, Shawn Spears, Lance Archer – y’all did a great job.
On Dynamite this week we have Top Flight versus TH2, Anna Jay versus Hikaru Shida and Will Hobbs versus a mystery jobber, so be sure to check that out and join in the Discord chat if you’re watching live. I’ll see you back here next week with more Dark reporting.
