It’s a rare Wednesday where wrestling fans with cable won’t need to channel-hop to catch their faves. Dynamite will be airing Saturday this week, but here are our pops & botches for the August 18 episode of AEW Dark to keep you entertained.
Last week on Dark…
Marko Stunt just about pulled off a crucifix powerbomb. We saw a marvellous man fight a super bad dude. Fénix got a singles workout. TH2 got robbed, which better give us some more indignant Jack Evans promos. Check out our August 11 recap.
Connecting the dots
Being The Elite continues to be an entertaining collection of wrestling-adjacent skits, with a touch of storyline cues thrown in.
On the Dark front, Colt Cabana was resurrected after being accidentally killed by Best Friends a few weeks ago, so he’ll be back in action with Dark Order tonight. Peter Avalon tried to join Dark Order, but was rejected, pushing him back together with tag partner, dungeon master and camera operator Brandon Cutler. Matt Hardy is still flipping out from Sammy Guevara’s chair shot (see Dynamite 8.5.2020) and takes it out on a new face.
Now let’s get into Episode 47 on YouTube.
Dim the lights, it’s time for Dark.
POP: Veda joins the booth
After a great couple of nights commentating the Women’s Tag Team Cup (check out our semifinals recap), Veda Scott joins Taz and Tony Schiavone in the booth for Dark.
POP: Super bad oil wrestling
Michael Nakazawa and Kip Sabian open the evening.
It’s a pretty straightforward Naka match. Sabian spends so much time kissing fiancée Penelope Ford that it gives Naka time to oil himself up and hit some slippy hijinx. Naka is so oiled up that the slaps Sabian attempts slide right off.
Ford’s reaction shot was priceless and makes our header image of the evening.
A more vicious slap whips oil into the ref’s eye, which could’ve been the opportunity for a wonderful cheap shot, except nobody took it. Boo! Eventually Naka goes for the underwear attack, Sabian reverses and gets the pin.
There isn’t much story here but Sabian addresses the camera after the match saying he was the first ever singles winner on AEW, so he deserves better. I can get down with that. Sabian – like Scorpio Sky – has been a fixture in Dark for a while and it does feel like he’s worth a bit of a push.
On the other hand, he makes such a good valet!
MEH: Kiss and Janela pad their stats
Next up is Sonny “The Concrete Rose” Kiss and Joey “The Bad Boy” Janela, who are 6 and 1 since tagging together. Good for them! Shawn Dean and Frank Stone are their opponents.
I haven’t seen Stone before. He’s a big guy who starts off just to get kicked in the face by Janela. He tags to Dean who eats some combo offense from our pretty bad boys. Frank is a little slow, leaving Janela waiting for offense a few times, which breaks up the flow a bit.
The two of visitors do a lot of kicks and elbows and stomps and… eh. It’s alright, but nothing thrilling.
There’s a fun spot where Janela hits a double DDT, goes up to the corner post, uses one guy as a stepping stone and double axe handles the other one. Then it’s Sonny with the hot tag. He shows off a cool “cravat into a split” that surely should be called a nut cutter or something.
They win it with a team finisher of Janela’s elbow drop and Sonny’s split leg drop. Janela ends with a bit of direct to the camera hyping of the duo.
The match wasn’t great, but I do like this new trend of letting the wrestlers try fit in a mini-promo after the match. It almost feels like “real sports”!
BOTCH: Attacking Glass Jaw’s knee
Will “OHKO” Hobbs get one-hit knocked out today? He’s facing Shawn “Glove of Doom” Spears, so things do not bode well.
They lock up. Hobbs stands tall against some of the weaker offensive moves coming from the Canadian. Spears gets a few kicks and slaps in, but nothing ol’ Glass Jaw can’t take.
Clearly manager Tully Blanchard hasn’t been watching Dark, because his advice for Spears is to take out Hobbs’ leg. Spears works the leg then wins it with a Death Valley driver, so maybe Hobbs has broken free of his tendency to pass out when the slightest gust of wind crosses his chin.
Oh, wait, here comes the Loaded Glove, after the match, clubbing Hobbs in the face and… he’s out cold! Poor guy.
Hobbs should come to the next match with a mouth guard and boxer’s stance.
POP: Let’s smash Darby!
Ricky Starks cuts a brutal promo on Darby Allin, saying he looks like he was raised on dog food and dope. This is a feud I would love to see.
MEH: Rust monsters
The Initiative roll 15 on their D20 in their match versus The Hybrid 2. Jack Evans flips and flops his way into the ring. Angélico struts in and kicks it off with Peter Avalon.
The starting duo pull off a bunch of nice evasions, culminating in a shush taunt, which is lovely. It’s been a while since The Librarian did something libraryish.
Brandon Cutler and Evans are up next. Evans shows off his air kicks, so Cutler kicks him in the face. Great job. They go through a seemingly endless exchange of near-falls that don’t feel as smooth as they should.
TH2 eventually get the win, which they deserve after having to eat a loss to Natural Nightmares last week, but it didn’t quite feel like as strong as a match as it could’ve been. I’m not sure if TH2 are still a bit rusty or if these two teams just haven’t had enough time to get their combinations down pat, but I was left wanting a bonus action.
POP: Zombie smash!
I don’t remember seeing Red Velvet on AEW before, but apparently she’s had two losses. Abadon comes crawling in “from the Black Hills” and things already look bad for Velvet. Abadon really has the most intimidating entrance in AEW right now.
Red Velvet gets a bit of token offense in to start, and even has time to mug for the camera. But Abadon ain’t having it and hits her with a monster headbutt.
There’s a fair bit of back-and-forth in this match, which given how dominant Abadon has been in the past few weeks really puts Red Velvet over. I don’t mind a bit of that, since I’ll take anything that strengthens the women’s roster right now. That said, I’d rather have a few good promos than a few good matches, since motivation is what’s mostly missing for me.
Abadon wins it with a new finisher, Cemetery Drive.
BOTCH: Dashed expectations
Next up was the match I was most excited for this week, after Ryzin cameoed as a Split Personality Hardy victim on Being The Elite. No, not that Ryzin. This red and black double-mohawked dude immediately had charisma, so I searched and discovered he’s an Occult Pro Wrestling Star™.
Before you watch #AEWDark tonight, learn a bit about the origin of @HAILRyzin before he makes his official @AEWrestling debut.. pic.twitter.com/GQYazEamUz https://t.co/hlHY0ROHcu
— MATT HARDY (@MATTHARDYBRAND) August 18, 2020
Team this guy with one of my favorite local jobbers Faboo Andre and new local jobber D3 – this is surely a recipe for indie magic!
The jobber trio of the week faces Colt Cabana and our two favorite Dark Order minions Alex Reynolds and John Silver.
Andre and Cabana get going with some colorful comedy wrestling and it is brilliant. Next up Ryzin comes in for some offense, then the little guy D3 is isolated to get spanked by the Dark Order. Cabana goes wild on everyone, then D3 eats a double Canadian destroyer (?) and the pin.
This was definitely not nearly enough Ryzin and Faboo Andre. D3 showed off his getting clobbered skills, and I’d tune in to watch him get clobbered again, but where was my Occult Pro Wrestler who cut a Twitter promo that he was prophesized to oppose the Dark Order? I demand more magic! And more Faboo!
POP: Starks starts to shine
Next up is Lee “0 and 13” Johnson versus “Absolute” Ricky Starks.
This match was unremarkable. The most important character development was when Starks set up for something like a standing moonsault and then sarcastically coffin-dropped Johnson.
How do you sarcastically coffin-drop? Well, you gotta be Ricky Starks, obviously. The guy is delightfully emotive in front of the camera, and now that he has a storyline, it’s worth keeping him there.
After Starks wins, Wardlow pops out to pin an MJF 2020 campaign badge on Johnson’s tights. Cute that he might be getting a storyline too as a reluctant MJF stooge. Keep it up, Dark writers!
POP: Proud and powerful squash
Tony Donati is a sleazy guy with greasy hair and sparkly pants – your standard middle-of-the-road wrestler. Baron Black has a crown made of twisted copper wire and crystals, the kind of thing you might find at a small town arts fair. Somehow, he pulls it off.
They’re up against Santana and Ortiz. Uh-oh.
The match goes exactly how you’d expect. Proud and Powerful utterly dominate. This was a fine squash.
BOTCH: Will this count for two wins?
Oh yawn, here we go. More Lance Archer beating people up.
For some reason he is up against two jobbers this week – Jon Cruz and Jessy Sorensen. Only Sorensen shows up, because Cruz apparently has already been killed backstage. Maybe his head got stuck through a ceiling tile or whatever.
Archer arrives with Cruz over his shoulder then steps into the ring to destroy Sorenson. And Cruz. This guy is so boring. One guy I’d be glad to disappear off to the “main roster” so that I don’t have to recap his squashes any more.
POP: Billy on top
Billy Gunn is accompanied to the ramp by adult son Austin, and they look like such a dopey family I kind of love it. Alan “5” Angels is accompanied to the ring by pretty much the whole Dark Order, including Anna Jay who appears fully inducted at this point.
Gunn is about three times the size of Angels, but perhaps one of the least-utilized Dark Order minions can find a weakness?
I mean, Angels is obviously outclassed here – in both weight and experience – but Gunn does his bit to make it look a touch competitive at times. Then he slams the shit out of Angels so hard it even makes ref Aubrey Edwards gasp.
Yeah, Angels is toast. But after the match a couple of other minions show up to jump all over Gunn, and that brings out Austin for the save. This has got to lead to a Dark Order versus Gunn Club match, right? Nice builder.
POP: Obligatory 8-man
The headliner is an 8-man tag match featuring Private Party on one side and The Butcher and The Blade on the other. This is gonna be a mess. SCU and Lucha Bros are there to smooth out the roughness of their respective partner teams.
Christopher Daniels starts things off with The Butcher. The Butcher is put over as the big guy who needs two people to get him out. Isiah Kassidy and Rey Fénix get some time together and it is thrilling, fast-paced action. Pentagón Jr spends some time getting the shit kicked out of him, which feels like some kind of karma for all the arms he broke in Lucha Underground.
All the participants get a good look-in here, and despite having 8 wrestlers on the ropes, this match stays fairly controlled. It does end up with a furious superkick (and enziguri) party where Marc Quen and Fénix take out everyone. CD and Pentagón exchange slaps, but it’s The Butcher and the Blade that pin CD with their bodgy back-breaking finisher.
This is the kind of pointless but fun tag match that AEW does very well. The match closes with Lucha Bros looking a bit grumpy that The Butcher and The Blade took it, so perhaps we’ll see a heel on heel fight soon.
This week’s Dark was 1.5 hours again, which I generally find too long. But somehow I enjoyed this one, despite there not being any standout matches. I think a lot of that is down to the small storyline bits happening, and perhaps the excellent booth of Taz, Veda and Schiavone. They gelled so well together and were a pleasure to listen to – my favorite AEW booth yet.
Did you enjoy the show? Let us know in the comments below. It’s a long wait to our next Dynamite instalment, so don’t forget to keep yourself entertained with our indie and retro coverage. Till next time, undercard fans!
