Previously on Friday Night Smackdown…
Summerslam happened! The Blue Brand saw Bayley retain, Mandy Rose belly flop around the ring after sending Sonya Deville packing, & The Fiend recaptured The Universal Championship only to get Big Dogged to death.
Tonight was somehow the go home show to another pay per view in Payback this Sunday. Could Smackdown build any intrigue with two hours prep? Or did they just smash the rematch button repeatedly? Let’s find out.
POP: Booking A PPV In Two Hours Done Right
For some reason still unclear to all of us, WWE decided to hold Payback a week after Summerslam. That clearly presents a bunch of issues, not the least of which being it takes a good amount of time to build intrigue heading into an event like that. You’re asking your audience to get excited for something with less than two hours of screen time to make it happen. Throw in the absolute garbage fire that was this week’s Monday Night RAW & I had little to zero faith WWE was going to put the slightest effort into building to Payback, let alone do anything that would make it appointment viewing.
Happy to report that I think they nailed it. The main story of the show is Mr. McMahon needs the three participants in The Universal Championship Match set for Sunday to sign the contract, so he tasks Adam Pearce with going to all of them to complete this task. Why Pearce has to go to them when you’d think the challengers would be all about signing on the dotted line to get a top of the card title shot & just come to him is beyond me, but let’s roll with it. This was a fun way to check in on each contender with the added bonus of weaving other parts of the show into Pearce’s journey as he travels through backstage. As we follow him around, matches get booked out it, backstage interviews occur & we get to see each guy involved in the triple threat in a different presentation than usual. It’s not just three pretaped promos about how each guy in going to win Sunday filled with slogans & the same thing we’ve heard a million times before.
We get a Firefly Funhouse segment out of it first & possible forgery with Bray signing for The Fiend, but I’ve given up on trying to understand WWE contract law long ago.
Great way to get everybody involved without anything feeling forced or like you were scrambling the entire time with such little build time. Throw in the two big returns later on & this episode was way better than it had any right to be. How the same people run this show & RAW, I will never truly understand.
POP: Fresh Matchups!
Here’s something cool: Every match on tonight’s show was the first of it’s kind. Granted, none of them were particularly high stakes & had pretty obvious outcomes, but it’s still a good idea to get wrestlers involved against other people on the roster & not just run them against the same one person ad infinitum until that current feud is over.
After AJ Styles shows up to complain about catching a brace to his face last week, we’re introduced to The Jeff Hardy Intercontinental Open Challenge answered by Shinsuke Nakamura. I’m not sure any iteration of Jeff facing off against Nak shouldn’t end with him getting his head taken clean off by a Kinshasa, especially in 2020, but the match was a lot better than I expected it to be. You got to give your champions impressive clean wins if anybody is going to get behind him & this was exactly that. It’s looking like all roads are leading to the inevitable Styles against Hardy rematch. Yup. Couldn’t possibly head anywhere else…
POP: Blue Thunderdome Bomb
Oh hey!
Forget everything I just said & bask in the return of Sam, by God, Zayn. He’s been gone for a solid five months now, so getting him back to reclaim the championship he was stripped of is a layup of a story. Santos Escobar better keep his head on a swivel as Jordan Devlin is probably going to drop him from behind any minute now. Zayn also appears to be neurotically insufferable as ever, so it’ll be fun to watch him interact with some of the guys like Riddle who weren’t there before. If nothing else, a match between Zayn & Hardy or better yet Zayn, Hardy & Styles should be a fun watch.
Sami & Roman’s returns also got me thinking just how absolutely stacked Smackdown’s men’s roster is right now. You’ve got those two, New Day, The Usos, Styles, Bryan, Cesaro, Nakamura, Miz, Morrison, Gable, Gulak, Bray, Braun, Hardy, & Riddle. Throw in guys who aren’t the best characters but can still work like Sheamus, Corbin, LHP & Heavy Machinery, & you’ve got a stew going, baby.
I am woefully disappointed in Cesaro & Shinsuke however for not allowing Sami in The Champions Lounge. He never lost his title! Give me a segment with those three, Bayley & Sasha Banks dumping all over the entire roster ASAP!
POP: The King’s Gambit
Chad Gable is going to cash in on buy one get one appetizers if it’s the last thing he does. I would’ve liked the bridge match between Riddle & Gable to have been a lot more fleshed out. Gable gets taken out in pretty short order (see what I did there?), which was very underwhelming. I feel like these two could put on a show if you gave them somewhere in the ten minute range, but unfortunately Gable was nothing but a stop gap for the Riddle/Corbin showdown they’ve been building to all along. Fortunately, we’re reaching the fireworks factory at Payback & those two will be squaring off. While I don’t think that’ll be match of the evening or anything, those guys could sneakily put on a really good outing if you let them. Riddle is obviously great & Corbin is a lot better in the ring than anybody wants to admit. Give them a little time & let them throw bombs at each other for a little bit & I’ll be perfectly sports entertained.
POP THEN BOTCH: Break The Banks
Bayley Dos Straps is playing with fire pretty hard on this episode. There’s another reference below, but this constant slander of Sasha Banks is going to get her Banks Statemented a lot sooner than later. Her pointing out how Sasha is borderline useless in a singles title defense (accurate) was particularly brutal. Sasha catches some heat for not being the best promo in the world, but she’s underrated as an actress. Just watch her facial expressions as Bayley keeps needling her. We all knew we’d get here eventually, but they’re definitely putting in the work & making the best of it.
We head on over to Botch territory once the voices of Bert & Ernie show up on The Titantron. Huskus The Pig Boy & Ramblin’ Rabbit have more on screen chemistry than these two. You know it’s bad when you look at Natalya & Lana thinking they should be more like that. Here, they talk about how they’ll defeat The Goldens this Sunday, but also how both of them suck? …Huh? I get it, they’re doing the common enemies thing, but the presentation is horrible. I figured no matter who was going to be facing Sasha & Bayley for the tag straps that they’d win, but can we maybe push that back & give it to an actual team? Or at least a less insufferable hastily thrown together one? I still think Shayna & Nia will win, but good lord, they’re making it an absolute slog to get there.
POP: Overpowered Point Presentation
Tough couple weeks for The Gu-serweight, everybody. Last week, he gets clubbed by Strowman simply for trying to help him fend off an attack from Retribution & this week he gets put in the ground for sticking up for himself. There’s a funny backstage bit with him smashing a chair on Braun with his back turned, only for it to have zero effect, so Gulak pulls the Eddie Guerrero & tosses it to Adam Pearce & bails. I’m hoping Daniel Bryan can come back soon so Gulak can stop being just fed to everybody in sight & taking loss after loss.
And hey, why was this matching happening, chair assault notwithstanding? Because Strowman demanded it or he wouldn’t sign the contract Pearce presented him earlier without it. You’ve now used your opening plot point to not only further the main story, but get us a match out of it as well. It’s almost like this stuff is easy when you put the most basic of effort into it.
POP: A House Party Divided
Cesaro against a luchador alert!!
Holy shiiiit is Cesaro a ridiculously athletic human being. Click on that video above & watch this guy toss & catch that man with laughable ease. I struggle to bring all the groceries inside with one trip & Cesaro’s out here twirling fully grown men around like a key chain on his finger. I also liked how Cesaro & Nak baited LHP out to ringside after Kalisto specifically asked them to stay in the back during his match. The heels actually observing struggles with their opponents & using it to their advantage works a lot better than them just randomly jumping people during interviews or whatever.
I’m not sure how many of you are interested in the tensions rising between Lucha House Party. I find it kind of weird they’d have Kalisto return & just hate his teammates right away. If anything, them breaking up has me scared for precious Gran Metalik, who would probably disappear into the catering ether without being part of a team that would allow him screen time. The story is making sense & progressing logically, so I can’t fault it too hard. As I’ve mentioned previously, as long as stuff makes sense, I’m willing to roll with it even if I don’t like the particular story.
POP: Twisted Bliss
Alexa Bliss finally makes her return at Not Summerslam by the summoning of Tamina of all people, just to say she’s totally fine after all the business with The Fiend & Braun Strowman. That is of course, totally fine minus her snazzy new dreadlock she’s sporting. Nikki Cross, despite being in a gang of roving lunatics not too long ago, takes this as a cry for help & gets mean mugged for her troubles.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all the way in on Blisster Abigail, I’m just not entirely sure how she fits in alongside Bray in the long run. Yeah, you can use her as a ploy to get to somebody like Strowman, but that feels more like a one off as opposed to something you can go to the well often on. Unless The Fiend targets Wesley Blake next, that presentation has run its course. It’s not like Bray needs a valet to talk for him & I doubt they’re going to present them as a couple or anything like that. Maybe we can just get Alexa a comically oversized mallet & she can be the Harley to Bray’s Joker & the two can just run amok all over both rosters on Smackdown.
POP: Heavy Mach-E-nery
Let’s address the elephant in the room first (No, not Otis. Don’t be rude). In case any of you missed Talking Smack this past week, a segment happened between Miz & Big E going back & forth regarding chances given in WWE to certain superstars. Miz tried to pivot it into heel heat by saying he gets opportunities on the show since he works hard & takes it seriously, unlike Big E, which is why he hasn’t gotten any big singles matches. Big E didn’t come out & say it, but it was heavily implied that racial privilege played a factor & social media ran with it, even if that was never the intent. Up until the show, Big E was advertised as being a guest on MizTV, but WWE scrapped it & gave us the six-man tag in its place. Morrison’s salmon analogy might’ve been worth it, if I’m being honest.
On the one hand, you can fault WWE for not running with the talking point of race over the years on their show & they had the chance to turn it into a positive, progressive message instead. I’m not sure what that would’ve looked like or how it would be received, but New Day have already been very visually involved with social issues on the show already, so I think it could’ve worked. Conversely, I don’t want anybody placed as a face or heel based on skin color in 2020 either, I don’t care how it’s framed. The most important point though is this is WWE & honestly, does anybody trust them with the nuance of something like that? I like to think they’ve gotten better over the years with the Kofi Kingston WrestleMania run highlighting that thought. Then again, it’s also not hard to see how New Day, Ricochet & Cedric, & The Hurt Business are all African American guys lumped together in one group. That’s not even considering Lucha House Party, The Kabuki Warriors or how Akira Tozawa is a damn ninja for some reason. And that’s just this year. No need to dive any further back otherwise you’re gonna have a bad time.
I’m not sure what was the better call, nor am I an authority on any kind of race relations. What I can say is we got the outcome that no doubt would’ve happened on MizTV anyway with Big E pinning Miz & continuing his current run of looking like a legitimate singles threat. The match that precedes the ending is fun enough in a very go home show kind of way, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. I liked Sheamus bailing & not for the “My team can’t win so I don’t want to be a part of it” excuse we normally see, but because Miz & Morrison are such selfish jerks they wouldn’t tag him in. You’re facing three hosses, guys! Tag the hoss on your team in! Anyway, keep the Big E wins coming & let’s run him up against the rightful Intercontinental Champion already.
(UPDATE: Apparently Miz & Big E squashed their beef on this week’s episode of Talking Smack & referenced a conversation off camera about it. I already wrote everything prior to finding this out, but feel free to catch the latest episode of that show if you want to see the follow up.)
Two quick notes before we move on:
First, Otis now has a Money In The Bank themed lunchbox & I officially need to know if he can use it cash in on somebody else’s lunch at any point during the year. This also makes him Mr. Money In The Bank as well as Mr. Meat In The Box for the record.
Secondly, in that lunchbox video above Bayley makes sure to say of Big E that “SOME people can only handle a Tag Team Championship” with Sasha standing right next to her & Sasha Banks is going to break her all the way in fucking half soon.
POP: Hotel Echo Yankee Mike Alpha November
Big time props to Roman Reigns for taking a five month vacation from WWE & finding the one guy on the roster who knows how to advocate a superstar getting that full time going forward.
All jokes aside, WHAT!? Not a single person saw this happening. Roman is really running with that Summerslam slogan, huh? Based on how that show ended, you could’ve reasonably assumed Reigns’ return was the start of another surefire giant babyface push. Yeah, he showed up & beat the ever loving hell out of Strowman & The Fiend, but Strowman pretty much turned heel after declaring Alexa Bliss dead to him then throwing her to ground about it & The Fiend is… well, a fiend. Roman taking them out with the force that he did could be rationalized in that they’re both heels as well as unstoppable monsters. But with Heyman on his side now? That’s 100% a heel turn. How could it not be? Did they just pivot The Fiend (you realize his name is THE FIEND, right?) back into a babyface position again? It has to be on purpose at this point.
What I like most about the pairing is Heyman was pretty much swooning over Roman during the feud with Brock Lesnar, so you can make the argument he put this in motion long ago. You also get the added bonus of giving Reigns a mouthpiece, which even though I think he’s a lot better on the mic than people want to credit him for, it’s easily the worst part of his presentation. Heyman immediately fixes that problem. Roman was easily at his best when he was the silent powerhouse of The Shield. He’d just wreck everyone & leave back then. Sound familiar?
This leads to all important question of what the hell is going to go down on Sunday. One thing for sure is that Braun Strowman is absolutely getting got & it’s just a matter of who gets him first. I don’t love the idea of The Fiend dropping a title he just won a week ago, but the out is there of having Bray pin Strowman so Heyman & Reigns can use the “You didn’t actually pin me” trope. On the other side, it’s hard to think they’d have Reigns come back with such a splash, put him alongside Heyman & then not pull the trigger on him. With either outcome, we should be getting a Fiend/Roman program out of it. Funhouse Bray promos against Paul Heyman promos? I’ll take all of that you got. At the very least, I’m very excited to see what happens at Payback
Random aside, but one thing I’m actually really digging is how layered “Payback” works as an event this year. You have the obvious revenge factor coming in rematches like The Mysterios against Rollins & Murphy or Keith Lee against Orton. But you also having Retribution looming, which Google tells me is a synonym for payback. Finally, you get Sami Zayn & Roman Reigns on the hunt to fix the wrong of neither of them ever actually losing their respective championships & wanting to become the rightful titleholders again. It’s completely minor & I’m not even sure if it’s intentional, but little things like that reward your audience for paying attention as opposed to making them frustrated that they even bothered to.
And there’s this week’s Smackdown. They did more in the closing five seconds of the show than RAW did in the eights hours it took Monday night to get me interested in Payback. What about you? Hyped for Sunday? Feel free to sound off below or over on the Discord! Be sure to check back in tomorrow for our coverage of Payback: You Never Saw Retribution Coming.
