Britt sheds her lab coat for Ricky - AEW (YouTube)

Pops & Botches: AEW Dark – 2.2.2021

AEW Dark Pops & Botches

 

Welcome to February, everyone! It’s not just a great month because it’s my birthday month, it’s also the shortest month, which means summer is at least two days closer than it would be if it wasn’t Feburary. The numbers don’t lie! Here’s our recap for the February 2 episode of AEW Dark.

Last time on Dark…

There were a whole lot of more-tedious-than-usual squash matches. Baron Black and Rey Fénix put on a show. Brooke Havok had her first ever wrestling match! Solow and Shotty looked to be vibing as a tag team. Catch up on all the pops and botches in our January 26 recap.

Elsewhere in the AEW Arcadia…

We’re still setting up the tables for our new Dynamite writer to crash some prose through, so here’s the skinny on what you missed: a bunch of unremarkable main roster stuff. Also, Jungle Boy took on Dax Harwood from FTR and they put together a fantastic match. In the absence of any undercard antics, let me remind you all of the hilarious video The Acclaimed dropped ahead of the show.

Being The Elite episode 241 dealt with the fallout of the underwhelming Luchasaurus/Brandon Cutler match from a couple weeks back. Luchasaurus invited the DM on a wholesome late night golf cart ride past some animatronic dinosaurs. I have no idea what it was all about, but it was the biggest smile dinosaurs have put on my face since I was about 6 years old. The Dark Order built a little blanket fort and had a slumber party. It was cute.

Sammy Guevara’s vlog (episode 305) got surreal as “Cody Rhodes” (the conceited and aloof main roster character) beat down Fuego del Sol, only to have Cody Rhodes (the T-shirt wearing jokester, as seen on Shot of Brandi and the vlog) show up to comfort him. Kayfabe is dead! Griff Garrison and Isiah Kassidy are having a feud. Amusingly, Garrison adopts some AAVE phraseology and Kassidy acts like Heel Matt Hardy. Everyone’s stealing everyone’s gimmick! Taz would have a hernia.

The Kip and Sammy show has settled into a fortnightly schedge. In episode 5 they steal the greenscreen that aging millenials The Young Bucks and The Good Brothers utterly failed to get over in BTE, and turn it into something hilarious. Jay Bizzle even gets to answer some questions! I stan these awkward beauties. It only has ten thousand views, which is about ten hundred thousand two few. Numbers!

73! Let’s cue it up.

Dim the lights, it’s time for Dark.

POP: Scrappy, scruffy, developmental fun

We open with a big six-man! TNT are teaming up with M’Badu to get him some training versus the Natural Nightmares and Nick Comoroto.

The wild man starts it off with Terrell Hughes, who immediately tags out to brother Terrence, then our Nigerian boss man. M’Badu cheapshots QT Marshall then the whole thing breaks down before it even got started. It’s all a bit chaotic till Dustin Rhodes comes in for a smooth oldskool exchange with Terrell. Terrell eventually gets the better of the older Rhodes brother, and he gets clobbered by Terrence and M’Badu before reaching Comoroto for the hot tag.

Comoroto cleans house. He briefly lifts M’Badu (a pretty big guy himself) with one hand! He’s a monster! He drops the rookie to the mat and pins him for the win.

POP: KC Navarro gets a dream match

Next up we have Rey Fénix in another singles outing. He’s facing my favorite jobber of the moment, KC Navarro.

Navarro is small and quick and works well with Fénix, who opens the match with a great sequence of locks and holds. Navarro hits a neat over-the-ropes, inside-out sort-of-a-619, then a stundog millionaire and gets Fénix down for a pin!

Well, yeah, nah. Fénix is not giving any time to this kid. He tangles Navarro up in a violent submission and almost makes him tap. This is a slick, technical match, the kind that if you look away you’ll miss a clever transition. Fénix finishes with an Eddie Guerrero frog splash.

POP: Kicks galore

Tesha Price is set to be beaten before the bell even rings. Her opponent Tay Conti comes out, then the whole goddamn Dark Order come out, with Anna “99” Jay and Negative One accompanying her to the ring.

Conti and Price exchange the usual set of opening maneuvers, but there is some swift dodging and blocking going on here and there which adds a nice martial arts flair to the proceedings. I’m not sure if it’s the influence of Conti or Red Velvet, but the AEW women in general seem to be leaning a bit more into this idea of using “legit” martial arts techniques, and it’s a good thing.

Conti finishes it with a running knee lift, bicycle kick and Tay KO.

POP: Fan service

After a week on Dynamite that featured more of the perplexing Cody Rhodes/Jade Cargill storyline, The Waiting Room has returned to its spiritual home here on Dark.

Britt Baker’s monologue reminded all the YouTube viewers about the various main roster storylines, and also kinda buried them. Perfect Dark content. Ricky Starks is our guest, wearing a tight white turtleneck. Baker is understandably smitten with him. The two heels kick off a steamy Wardlow/Hager routine, getting >>this<< close to sharing a kiss when Tony Schiavone shows up outta nowhere to declare "we're out of time". Damn you, Ski-a-vone! Ruining our Bricky ship before it even exited the harbor.

FINE: Jordyn returns, minus santa hat

Thunder Rosa and mean girl Dani Jordyn are here to cool us off.

Thunder Rosa takes the real mean girl straight to the mat and they get into some chain wrestles till Rosa hits a senton. Jordyn comes back with an uppercut and dropkick, but she wastes the advantage by going back to her burn book to look up an appropriate burn. Unfortunately she opens it to Freya the Slaya’s page, and after that it’s all Rosa all the time.

Jordyn never really looked like she’d win this. Rosa takes it with a piledriver and her face make-up isn’t even the slightest bit smudged.

POP: Proud and Powerful clean house, again

If you watched Sammy Guevara’s vlog (or the bonus promo linked above), you’ll know Fuego del Sol has been teamed with sexy metaler Vary Morales to face… oh no. Santana and Ortiz. These guys gonna get got.

Ortiz and del Sol get into it with some quick lucha and stiff slams. Santana tags in to punish the little luchador a little more before handing him back to his partner for the pin.

Morales didn’t even tag in! Another emphatic squash by Proud and Powerful. Chris Jericho and MJF better watch out.

POP: Hirsch is mad

Angry Russian amateur wrestler Leyla Hirsch is back on Dark this week, facing comedy wrestler Katalina Perez. Will she crack a smile?

Hell no. Hirsch stalks and slams her pink-haired opponent all over the ring. Eventually Perez comes back with some serious forearm strikes, but they just bounce off Hirsch like it’s nothing.

Two seconds later Perez is caught in an armbreaker and tapping out. It’s a squash. It’s a good one.

POP: Everybody loves The Acclaimed

OH YES. It’s The Acclaimed with a new music video! The lyrics reference the tag team battle royal happening later on Dynamite. Given the state of the main roster and Don Callis’ Impact over the past few weeks it’ll probably be another screwy finish, but that’s alright, because we have some in-ring action with the most irritating rappers on the roster right here, right now.

They’re facing the jobber duo of Occult Pro Wrestling Star RYZIN and NJPW aerial guy Danny Limelight.

Max Caster spits a brutal rap about tampons and spiders, it’s the worst and the best at the same time. I love these guys.

The match starts with everyone kicking everyone, then Limelight jumps over the ropes to give Caster the bump he deserves. He kicks Anthony Bowens in the face too, only to get dropkicked by the returning Caster. Ryzin hits a leg lariat and a couple of American spots, but then The Acclaimed take control.

Limelight gets the hot tag and bounces round like a pinball taking out the heels, but this one goes to The Acclaimed. It will be glorious to watch these guys get killed by a top-tier face team on a PPV someday.

BOTCH: Dashed expectations

Here’s the big one! It’s an 8-man, featuring all indie legends. In the winners’ corner we have Bear Country, “The Concrete Rose” Sonny Kiss and “Bad Boy” Joey Janela. In the losers’ corner we have Aaron Solow, “The Captain” Shawn Dean, “The Empbruh” Baron Black and “Man Of Steel” Mike Verna. Can we call it as match of the night before it even started? I think so.

Solow and Janela get us off to a technical start. Next up is Verna and Kiss, then Black and Kiss, then Dean and Kiss! Poor Sonny is getting killed in there.

Woo! It’s Janela with the hot tag! DDT! Thrust kick! Dude jumps off the bearses shoulderses into the whole damn team of jobbers. It all breaks down for a moment, then Bronson tags in for the Bears. And, like, someone gets pinned? I dunno?!

Scratch the match of the night, this match sucked. Everyone seemed to be having a fun time, but there wasn’t any structure or pacing. All of these guys can do so much better.

FINE: Still not working out

Here come Ivelisse and Diamante to take on jobber duo Vertvixen and Jazmin Allure.

The champs hit stereo arm drags before Allure and Ivelisse square off. Allure hits a dropkick to la sicaria’s face, then tags out to Vertvixen. The vixen tries a few kicks, but Ivelisse smashes her to the ground then hands over to Diamante for the suplex and a flurry of strikes.

This sounds more interesting and action-packed than it is. The champs massively outclass Vertvixen, who eventually tags out to Allure, who gets a bit of offense in before Diamante pulls it together and sets up the finisher.

Diamante and Ivelisse were looking good this week, but there were too many moments where the competition couldn’t quite keep up.

I wish I could spend just one of these columns gushing about all the women’s matches. It’s maddening that the bench just doesn’t run deep enough in AEW. Dynamite has a different problem of not giving the women enough time to get their characters over or build compelling feuds. On Dark we’ve grown to know and love the personalities, but the in-ring skills are so far behind what other promotions are offering it’s an effort to stay invested. I hope they can find a way to fix this.

POP: Fun club

Let’s see if Dark’s favorite fam can sort it out. Billy and Colten are teaming together for Gunn Club versus the jobber duo of John Skyler and Ray Jaz.

The corona era’s loudest fan – Austin Gunn – is joining us on commentary. Here’s his latest freestyle, by the way.

Ray Jaz got all of two seconds in the ring last week, if I recall, but I liked what I saw. I like him this week too, starting the match on hands and knees in some kind of amateur wrestling stance. He and Colten tangle up and wrestle around on the mat like it’s the Olympics. Jaz is incredibly slick sneaking out the way of maneuvers and it feels like he could really go over if he’s as smooth on the mic as he is in the ring.

Skyler looks like a misplaced Forgotten Son by comparison. Apparently dude is back from an injury, but you wouldn’t know it as he eats some of Billy’s oldskool offense before fighting back to bash him into the steel ring post and fire off a spear.

Colten gets the hot tag and clotheslines the planet before sending Skyler down for the pin. Gunn Club keep on bringing the good vibes.

POP: Little bit o’ the comfort food

Texas superstar “The Pink Dream” Alex Gracia is back this week to lose to Red Velvet.

This is a decent fight. Gracia doesn’t get the chance to dig deep into her lucha arsenal, but she keeps up with Velvet for the most part. The main downside to this match is it feels like we’ve already seen it play out a half dozen times. Even though it’s their first meeting, there’s nothing new going on here. Still, if we see Dark as consisting of both consequential dark matches and fly-on-the-wall practice sessions, this is a solid practice session.

MEH: Put the child to bed

Jake St Patrick is back again this week, letting us all know it’s still St Patrick’s day, baby. Preston “10” Vance is accompanied by Dark Order, and Negative One joins us again on commentary. Let’s see if the 9-year-old can make it through a match without telling Excalibur to shut up.

Negative One is still marking the fuck out over 10, and it’s kinda cute for the first 20 seconds. Taz and Excalibur distract him long enough that St Patrick can come back from taking a vertical suplex and toss a few drop kicks and stomps in the direction of Vance.

St Patrick seems to be a bit of a one kick pony, but he has charisma so I’d be keen to see him back again. He’s pinned, of course, after a spinebuster and powerbomb from Dark Order’s horseyman.

Let’s get this kid out of here and move on to the main event.

POP: SCU still on a roll

It’s Chaos Project versus SCU!

Serpentico and Frankie Kazarian lock up. After a bit of technical back-and-forth we get Luther making a hash of things in the wonderful way only he can. Christopher Daniels spends a good chunk of the match in the corner, but once he comes out, he comes strong.

Both teams get a solid thwacking before CD gets Serpentico down for the pin. Some messy spots, but hard-hitting and an entertaining end to the night.

This felt like a bit of a filler episode of Dark, in as much as Dark is kind of a “filler” show anyway. It didn’t advance any storylines and didn’t have any stand-out matches. No match of the night for me, although I have to say Gunn Club versus Ray Jaz and John Skyler was better than I anticipated and left me cheerful and optimistic.

The upcoming Dynamite has a treat for undercard fans, because our superbad king and queen Kip Sabian and Penelope Ford will be doing a wrestling wedding! Featuring Miro as best man and Chuck Taylor as the butler! Shenanigans will almost certainly ensue. The other segment to keep an eye on will be the battle royal, where Top Flight and The Acclaimed will represent the rookies, and other teams who have been building storylines on Dark will also appear. Should be a fun episode.

That’s it from me this week, hope you all enjoyed the show and the column. I’ll see you next week for more undercard fun.

     

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